Cloudy With a Chance Of Flares

Or For My Next Trick, I’ll Predict the Weather…

I’m awesome at predicting rain. No one questions me anymore. It’s a gift I’ve had since I was a kid. I didn’t even realize that I was showing signs of fibromyalgia back then, but I was. I could feel the air pressure change in my joints and in my head. My joints would stiffen and give off this dull throbbing ache. I could feel a migraine coming on. Sometimes it would stay mild enough for me to get through my day, distracting me only a little. Other times I’d be bowled over with dizziness, nausea, my vision would blur, and my head would feel like it was splitting wide open. As if it was I were Zeus trying to birth my own fully grown Athena.

The migraines were the worst for me growing up. There was nothing I could do but sleep and pray for it to end. I’ve fainted from migraines before. Something about my blood pressure getting all wonky coupled with the dizziness knocking me out. I became really good at sensing when I was going to pass out. I could feel the tunnel vision coming on and would quickly find a place to sit where I wouldn’t hurt myself. Sometimes just sitting would regulate my blood pressure and it would pass without incident. I hated having to go to school on migraine days. The noise, the lights, not knowing if I was going to faint… But there were only so many days a year I could take off from school as a sick day. If I took every day I felt sick off, I would hardly have been in school.

As I got older, I became more sensitive to weather changes. Heat exhausts me. Plain wipes me out. Earlier in the summer, before we put in our smaller air conditioners, it had gotten unexpectedly hot for a few days. I couldn’t get out of bed. I had absolutely no energy. I had a fan going, I drank ice cold drinks, nothing worked. Humidity always brings on a flare. I can always tell when it’s going to be a muggy day because I wake up with my back muscles spasming. If it’s cold and wet? I’m screwed. That’s the worst. Winter is brutal on my body. I can barely function. Everything hurts and I get horribly depressed.

It hasn’t helped that the last few winters here have been awful. The cold makes even my skin ache. Everything stiffens up, knots up, and spasms. I’ve tried deep tissue massages. I actually love them even though they kill me because it’s some relief to get those knots loosened a bit. Notice I said “a bit”? Yeah, I have knots that never go away. Ever. Sometimes an entire muscle will feel like a rock, all knotted up. It’s painful. I take muscle relaxers daily for this. But on cold rainy or snowy days, nothing works. I just hurt. And sometimes all I can do is cry from the pain. It sucks. I really want to move somewhere with a more temperate and drier climate. That’s the dream anyway!

So, now you know, if the forecast is sunny and I tell you to take your umbrella… Take the umbrella. Chances are I’m right.

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